It’s Only April and the Red Sox Already Suck

I’m still riding hot on Final Four weekend and the NCAAB National Championship going 3-0 for +12 units, but today the Red Sox brought me back to Earth cause they fucking succkkkkkkkkk.   Today was a lousy day of work so I was pretty happy that there was a 2:00 baseball game that I could bet on. Red Sox home opener, ring ceremony for those assholes and their ace Chris Sale on the mound vs. the garbage Blue Jays. Sox -245 it is (in a reverse with 1H Mets -.5…another loser).

Red Sox get a nice 2-0 start off a Mitch Moreland home run in the 1st inning and then a Dustin Pedroia RBI in the 3rd. It didn’t take long for them to blow this lead and by the end of the 4th inning this game already got out of hand for Sale and it was a 5-2 game for the Jays. Hate to see how terrible the Sox ace is this year…absolutely atrocious.  In the sixth, the reigning AL MVP Mookie Betts hit a dinger to make it 5-3 and then the Red Sox score again on an error to make it 5-4.  We got a game again and I’m gaining hope that they come back and cash this day game for me.  Nope, another Jays run the next inning and just like that the Sox are down 2 again. Xander Bogaerts answers back the next inning, scoring in JD on an RBI double and the Sox make it 6-5. I’ll take it. They’re down 1 again. Easy comeback for the World Series champs at home.  Then again in the 9th inning the Sox let Toronto score again to make it 7-5.  I’m pretty much all out of hope here and then these fuckers tease me. 

Bottom of the 9th inning. Dustin Pedroia starts off the inning with a base hit after grinding out a nice at bat. Jackie Bradley draws a walk. Still no outs. Alex Cora’s smug face decides to have Swihart pinch hit here coming in cold and the asshole hits a shitty fly out on the first pitch. Top of the order coming up and we’re in decent shape with the winning run at the plate and only 1 out. Andrew Benintendi comes up and also flies out on a shitty pitch. Asshole. But the table is still set for the MVP to come in and hit a walk off home run to end the game and write the perfect story for all the lunatic Red Sox fans and cash my bet. But no, he strikes out to end the game.

The easier part of betting on teams you absolutely hate is that when they lose in an atrocious manner, you can’t hate them any more than you already do. The Mets decided to screw around and lose with Jake DeGrom on the mound (double loser there). Another team I hate everything about.

Go Yankees.

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